Misunderstandings

This one is for my friend...who unfortunately is under some misunderstanding regarding me...and has stopped speaking to me ! Hey friend...I'm really sorry if anything has gone wrong...Just want to say...I really miss ur friendship!

Misunderstandings do come into life
No matter how lucky people may be
Relations break and so do friendships
No matter how strong the ties may be

One such relation, the one I treasure
That was with you, sweet beyond measure

Some things that u made me see
Made me admire u as no one ever did
Amidst friends and amidst foes
I started praising u like a crazy kid !

Do u think it's wrong to adore someone nice?
Or do u think it's foolish to say that he is nice?

Everything that u imagined and all that u have heard
I just know its rubbish, whatever u have heard !
All that is happening and all that is being said,
Makes me regret, why I never used my head !

How I wish I could tell u, that I still admire u,
As nothing but a friend, as nothing but as U !
How I wish I could tell u, that I really miss u,
As nothing but a friend, as nothing but as U !

Never did I dream and never did I think,
That even our friendship would ultimately sink...
Tears roll down my eyes thinking that all is over,
The saga of a friendship, burried under a thick cover !!!

A helpless love

Standing by the lakeside,

As the dawn nears,

Behind my smile I hide..

An ocean full of tears!

Like the calm,still lake,

I wish I could make...

My mind free of thoughts,

of you and your lots!

Watching the birds fly,

I wish I could cry...

And wash out without a clue,

Every memory of You !

But helplessly I stand,

Waiting for your hand,

For you r in every breath..

Can't part with you until death!

Aaj phir...

Aaj phir kai dinon baad

Aayi is kadar tumhari yaad

ki har zarre mein mujhe tum nazar aaye

har zikr mein bas tum hi tum ho chhaye

Aaj phir hua mujhe woh pyara sa ehsaas

jaise tum ho yahin kahin, mere aas paas

nazron ne dhoondha har chehre mein tumhara chehra

kaho, kaise doon main is bekaaboo dil pe pehra?

Aaj phir koshish ki maine khud ko samjhane ki

tumse door jaane ki, tumhari yaadon ko mitane ki

Par kya karoon ki ab to zalim yahi haqeekat hai

Tumhe to nahin, tumhari yaadon ko zaroor mujhse mohabbat hai !!!

A permanent scar !

There was a complete silence

Like that in the outer space

After he uttered that sentence

that finally broke the delicate lace

Where the hell did I go wrong?

It was for him...I waited for so long

Waited for a promise that he made

to be fulfilled either under sun or shade!

Are promises meant to be broken?

Is this what he's given me as a token?

...of all the faith I held in him!

...of all the love I held within!

Thoughts like that wandering in my mind,

Amidst the silence that was a killing kind,

I kept staring at the person in front...

who pierced my heart leaving a scar permanent !!!

Why hold on? Let go!

In a Psychology class, Aditi was called up to the dais and asked to sit on the lecturer's chair. The rest of the class was then asked to say some good things about her one after the other. The first one said,"Oh..you have such a beautiful hair". The next one said," Hey...your smile is so sweet".Whenever a student would praise her, the glow over her face would keep on increasing like the waxing phase of the moon. This continued till the last student. She was now as bright with happiness as the Full moon.

After everybody finished praising her, it was now the lecturer's turn. He said," It's ok that everybody has praised you. But let me tell you frankly. Those pimples on your face look so dirty! And what kind of that dress have you worn??? It's looking horrible! Disgusting!" The smile on Aditi's face vanished at once and she became depressed and dull like a black hole. The lecturer then asked her to go back and take her seat. He observed her for the rest of the lecture. She was lost in some thoughts and was as dull as never before.

The question now is, while so many people praised her, why did she cling on to the last negative comment that she got? Why do we forget the happy events so soon and keep the sad events in focus? Why don't we LET GO?

Now letting go here, doesn't mean that we start pretending that the event has never occurred. Each event in our life leaves it's impact on us which we cannot deny. Every moment is an experience no matter whether it is a sad or a happy one. And we have to look at the past in order to learn from it, to bring greater understanding, compassion, and perspective to it. Letting go doesn't mean we forget the event as a whole. It just implies that we should let go of the negative memories linked to it, and at the same time, clinging on to what we learnt from that and what had brought a smile on our faces. And this is possible only through consistent practice. We should train our memory in such a way that it retains the good experiences in mind and deletes the bad ones which make us sad. After all, one gets good only at what one practices. If we practice holding on to negative thoughts, we will get very good at dwelling on what has hurt us in the past...which will bring nothing but pain. On the other hand, if we practice letting go, we'll be forever at peace, and we can move forward in life with full of positivity.

"Dwelling on any unhappy moment in life, is like channel surfing through a thousand possible TV shows, selecting and watching the one that troubles you the most, and then blaming the TV set for the pain that you are feeling!"

Life is tooooooooo short to hold on to negative feelings and negative pasts. Then why hold on? LET GO AND SET URSELF FREE !

Mann Paache bhaage, kadam chale aage - Written by D N Madhok, Music by Gyan Dutt, Sung by K L Saigal

In this song, the poet is describing the internal conflict between heart's desires and mind's rational thinking. The bittersweet tug-of-war between heart and mind!

Mann Paache bhaage, kadam chale aage, Mann paache bhaage

My heart is urging me to take the leap, but my intellect is cautioning me to pause. When I'm deeply drawn to someone or something, my passionate instincts say, 'go for it!' Yet, my rational mind whispers, 'hold on, consider the consequences, and think it through.' It's a tug-of-war between my impulsive 'kadam' and my wise 'Mann'.

Kaisa hai yeh jaal moh ka, kaise pakke dhaage, mann paache bhaage. 

A delicate balance between outer attractions and inner harmony. The poet weaves a mesmerizing tale of conflicting desires, where the lure of external allurements vies with the strength of internal unity. The poet masterfully portrays the tantalizing allure of external attractions, while simultaneously highlighting the profound pull of introspective unity.

Main bisaraaun, woh yaad aaye. Saath saath unke parchaaye

Try as I might to erase him from my mind, memories of him resurface, reigniting the internal debate. While my intellect urges me to move on, my heart holds tight to the past, as if afraid to let go. The memories flood back, carrying with them the whispers of what could have been.

Kaise unse aankh churaayun. Jinse naina laage.

How can I ignore or move away from that person, with whom I have created an emotional bonding! Here, although aankh and naina, both mean the same, but interpretations are different. Aankh is superficial, Naina is deep. Even if I take my gaze away from the physical form, how can I ignore or walk away from the deep emotional connect?!

More mandir prabhu, tum bas jaavo. Vahin savera, jahaan jaage. 

Then he comes up with a beautiful and heartfelt prayer- 

Lord, please inhabit the sanctuary of my heart and mind. Guide me through this inner turmoil, and may Your presence illuminate my path. Wherever You awaken me, that will be my new beginning.

I once asked a very successful woman to share her secret with me. She smiled and said to me..

"I started succeeding when I started leaving small fights for small fighters.
I stopped fighting those who gossiped about me...
I stopped fighting with my in laws...
I stopped fighting for attention...
I stopped fighting to meet peoples expectation of me...
I stopped fighting for my rights with inconsiderate people..
I stopped fighting to please everyone...
I stopped fighting to prove they were wrong about me....
I left such fights for those who have nothing else to fight...

And I started fighting for
my vision,
my dreams,
my ideas and
my destiny.

The day I gave up on small fights is the day I started becoming successful & so much more content."

Some fights are not worth your time..... Choose what you fight for wisely.

Some people go away without any warning...
It's then that we realize & regret not having expressed our affection towards them! "I love you", "You mean a lot"... some simple words. Lets use them generously towards the people who care for us !

Mom's Jantikalu (Murkulu) and Chiwda

My friend came back from India yesterday and guess what she brought for me?... Jantikalu and Chiwda made by my mom. I have been craving for them since a long time....may be 2 and half years.
Sitting on my recliner and eating those jantikalu...I feel so nostalgic. Sooo many memories are associated with them.

When we were kids, mom used to make them quite frequently. Me and my bro used to finish them off as soon as she made them. It was so much fun...playing with the different shapes of jantikalu...wearing them as finger rings or blowing them as cigars. Reminds me of a rainy day in Nagpur... our house in Ramnagar...and we as kids eating as many jantikalu as we could!
Then, during my MBBS days, mom used to send me a packing of jantikalu and chiwda every month. My friends used to like them a lot. Some specially used to come to my room to have them. Ahh! My hostel room! I miss the hostel so much ( Although I used to grudge about the place when I was there!). Akanksha used to love Jantikalu a lot! And Deepti... she used to love the cashews in my chiwda. She was a chatterbox of our batch and one of my close friends. She used to involve me in her talks and eat away all the cashews in my chiwda! We used to mix chiwda, murmure, some onions and tomatoes all together with some tomato kechup and some sev on the top. It was a favourite snack for me, Manjiri and Deepti! And today when I'm eating this without them, I'm missing my friends so much! Reminds me of an evening in my hostel room... me and my friends... jantikalu and chiwda... tea on the stove and a lot of things to talk about!
It's strange how some things are so closely linked to some sweet memories. And... as and when we come across those things, the memories are back... making us nostalgic! And all we can do is... just smile with some wet eyes...wishing...how wonderful it would be to live back those moments again!

Beautiful morning... After a good night's sleep... Ah!! I'm feeling soo fresh! Starting to study. Hope I can do much more today ... :)

Missing home

Took a tea break and started to study again. Thought of finishing off a few chapters before I take a break again. So... Just to refresh my mind, I danced for a few minutes and sat back. I was feeling hot... So I started on the AC. Cool breeze coming from the AC is making me nostalgic! It's reminding me of the summer back home in India... When we used to relax in the cool breeze of the cooler! Huh! Missing home :(

An artist again!

So happy to have made something after long long time. This is my first artwork after wedding.

:-)

Prayer of Saint Francis

This is one of my favourite prayers-

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon:

where there is doubt, faith ;

where there is despair, hope

where there is darkness, light

where there is sadness, joy

O divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love;

for it is in giving that we receive,

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

The pale blue dot

The famous “pale blue dot” photo – Earth as seen from Voyager 1 while on the edge of our solar system (approximately 3,762,136,324 miles from home). Sagan’s words are always worth remembering:

Look again at that dot. That’s here. That’s home. That’s us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every ‘superstar,’ every ‘supreme leader,’ every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there — on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.

The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds.

Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.

The Earth is the only world known so far to harbor life. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit, yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment the Earth is where we make our stand.

It has been said that astronomy is a humbling and character-building experience. There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our tiny world. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly with one another, and to preserve and cherish the pale blue dot, the only home we’ve ever known.

Fingers crossed...

Just can't wait anymore...

Can someone temme what's there in store?

Whether the storm will make me sway

Or whether I will make my own way?

Will I reach to my dreams

Or will I flow away in the reality streams?

Just can't wait anymore...

Can someone temme what's there in store?

With few more days to go....

Few more fears they grow...

Probabilities and Presumptions...

and few unwarranted assumptions!

Wish life was not so complicated...

and everything could be easily anticipated

Without any surmise,without any suspense

Life could just be without any pretense!

But I know that it's a crazy wish

and u surely can call it Amateurish!

B'coz thrills and surprises...yeah I know,

Are all that make life such an exciting show!

But still...just can't wait anymore...

Someone Please temme...what's there in store !!!

My favorite introduction...

Hi all...

Sometimes it is hard to introduce yourself because you think you know yourself so well that you do not know where to start with. Lemme give a try...

I am someone who is quite positive about things in life. I strongly believe that everything that happens in life, happens for a good reason...it's just that, we have to search the reason in it.

There are many things I like to do, to see, and to experience.
I like to read, I like to write;
I like to think, I like to dream;
I like to talk, I like to listen.
I like to look at the clouds in the sky with a blank mind, I like to do thought experiment when I cannot sleep in the middle of the night.
I like train journeys...looking at the woods...deep in thoughts.
I like nature, I like humanity.
I like to hug people when they r sad.
I like being needed.
I like to see people smiling...
And, I like to smile....!

I always wanted to be a great musician, a great singer, a great Veena artist,a great dancer, a great poet, a great chess player and...a proficient doctor.

Of course, I'm no where close to all this yet.

I'm just someone who does some singing, some composing, some playing, some dancing, some poetry and some curing.
But my dreams are still alive!

This is a brief introduction of myself....there is much more which even I'm trying to understand.

To conclude....I was born to learn, to grow, to expand, to love, to create, to enjoy, to see the beauty in all things including myself... But I was NOT born to be perfect !

CHARACTER...by William Wordsworth.

A beautiful poem describing the human character...

I marvel how Nature could ever find space

For so many strange contrasts in one human face:

There's thought and no thought, and there's paleness and bloom

And bustle and sluggishness, pleasure and gloom.

There's weakness, and strength both redundant and vain;

Such strength as, if ever affliction and pain

Could pierce through a temper that's soft to disease,

Would be rational peace--a philosopher's ease.

There's indifference, alike when he fails or succeeds,

And attention full ten times as much as there needs;

Pride where there's no envy, there's so much of joy;

And mildness, and spirit both forward and coy.

There's freedom, and sometimes a diffident stare

Of shame scarcely seeming to know that she's there,

There's virtue, the title it surely may claim,

Yet wants heaven knows what to be worthy the name.

This picture from nature may seem to depart,

Yet the Man would at once run away with your heart;

And I for five centuries right gladly would be

Such an odd such a kind happy creature as he.

Good Bye 2009! HAPPY 2010 :)

First and Foremost... lemme wish u all a very HAPPY 2010 !

As always...I have made a biiig list of resolutions this time too :) Let's see how far I can follow them!

2009.... was a happening year for me! It was a mixture of happy and sad moments. But as a whole, it has brought some very good people into my life... it has given me a lot of sweet memories to cherish...and it has taught me a lot in all aspects of life !

Just wanted to say...

• For all those I've made promises to and never kept - it was not deliberate but I will "improve" in 2010.

• Those that I owe lunches, movies, night out , etc..., I'll fix that as well, I'll make time . For sure.

• For those that have supported me and made me smile through all my hardships...I salute you! halaala.

• For those I've disagreed with, argued with and just never got along with......well, I'm Sorry!!!!!!! Let's try again next year.

• Those that I've hurt.....unintentionally/intentionally....even if I've already apologized "I'm Sorry" again...

• All the true friends that I have: You Rock!! Hope to have you till the end!

WISH YOU A WONDERFUL YEAR AHEAD !!! KEEP SMILING !

Thodi si shayri...

Na kar koshish samajhne ki,

Is pagalpan mein sambhalne ki,

Kyun ki sangeen si is duniya mein,

Hasne ke liye zaruri hai...

thoda sa pagal banne ki!!!

Ek Ummeed nakam hui to kya gam hai,

Ek Din dhali, sham hui to kya gam hai,

Dil mein armaanon ki kuch kami to nahin,

Ek aur sahi, aazmane mein kya sharm hai!!!

A little contemplation...

Got this in my mail today....it's worth giving a thought!!

Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine if,we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tomorrow" I say! "I will call on Jim"
"Just to show that I'm thinking of him."
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner! yet miles away,
"Here's a telegram Sir" "Jim died today."
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.

Remember to always say what you mean.
If you love or like someone, tell them.
Don't be afraid to express yourself.

Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you.

Because when you decide that it is the right time it might be too late.
Seize the day. Never have regrets.

And most importantly, stay close to your friends and family,

for they have helped make you the person that you are today.